


Green is not a creative colour.... until it was.

by Just_Another_Weirdo



Series: The things I do for love [5]
Category: Sanders Sides (Web Series)
Genre: A lot of eggs, Arguing, Because of black pudding, Blood, Eggs, Fluff, Food, Gen, Implied/Referenced Self-Harm, Intrusive Thoughts, Janus is bad at self care, Sleep Deprivation, Which is made with pig's blood
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-07-10
Updated: 2020-07-10
Packaged: 2021-03-04 22:13:54
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,473
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25183834
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Just_Another_Weirdo/pseuds/Just_Another_Weirdo
Summary: After a long night of making sure a friend is alright, Thomas hadn't slept as much as he, nor his sides, would've liked. And now, too early for his liking, they were here, arguing. Loudly.Then Remus appeared.
Series: The things I do for love [5]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1727602
Comments: 6
Kudos: 57





	Green is not a creative colour.... until it was.

**Author's Note:**

> I wrote this in a hurry because I'm leaving and I don't have much time, hope you enjoy this idea I got while I was sleeping.

Thomas sighted loudly, rubbing his eyes. He had been up most night. And now this.

All his sides known, with the exception of Remus, were present. And arguing. A lot.

“She was suicidal, we couldn’t just leave her alone!” Patton said. “She could’ve harmed herself, or worse!”

Janus rolled his eyes. Although everyone had bags under their eyes, Janus seem the most affected one, being the only one who had been awake the whole night. “Thomas can’t cure depression, Patton. We can’t help her, we aren’t professionals.”

“Janus is right” Logan said, fixing his glasses. “However, friend’s support is also very important, so Patton is also right.”

“So what are we going to do?” Virgil asked, hoodie on and hands sunk deep in his pockets. “We can’t just… let her be! What will we do when she has another episode?! What if it’s worse?”

“What if she hurts herself?” Thomas said.

There was a moment of silence. Roman opened his mouth to say something, but shook his head and decided it wasn’t worth it.

Janus sighted. “Thomas. Honey. You are not responsible for anyone’s happiness.” He said, holding back the sharpness on his words. “You told her before to get professional help, and she didn’t listen. What else can we do?”

“Maybe we should tell her parents?” Roman proposed.

Patton turned to him, alarmed. “No! She told us not to! We can’t break her trust like that!”

“Is her trust more important than her wellbeing? Because I don’t think so!” Roman exclaimed.

“What if telling them only makes her feel even worse? What if she hates us?” Virgil asks.

Logan fidgeted with his tie. “We cannot know how she would react to this hypothetical situation.”

“It’s not like we have any more ideas…” Thomas said.

“Thomas needs to rest.” Janus said. “This… situation, it can’t be always ours to resolve. I’m not saying we abandon the cause. I’m saying it’s too much for us alone.”

“But… She doesn’t have anyone else.” Patton said.

Thomas exhaled tiredly once more. There was a moment of uncomfortable silence.

“If I rip Janus’s scales off, would they grow back?” Remus asked, appearing behind Logan and Janus, who jumped, making an undignified squeak.

“Actually, I’m not quite sure, so correct me if I’m wrong,” Logan said “but they should be back once he sheds.”

“We’re getting off topic” Janus complained. “And please, do not test it out.”

“Ooh, do you shed like a snake? Like, all your skin at once?” Remus asked, tapping Janus’s snake face. Janus slapped his hand away.

“REMus.” He exclaimed, blushed. “Stop. We’re in the middle of something.”

“Ya know, for self preservation, you have awful self care habits” Remus pointed out, changing the topic once.

Janus groaned. “Oh, my god, you, are an–” He didn’t finish, groaning loudly.

“He’s right, though” Virgil said. “You sent me to bed, but you don’t go yourself?” He scoffed. “Hypocrite.”

Janus smiled, a tic on his snake eye. “Oh, please! Do talk about hypocrites, Virgil. You have so much experience, right?”

Logan placed his hand on Janus shoulder, to both calm him and hold him back. Janus slapped it away. He glared at Virgil, who glared back. Both of them too prideful to apologise.

“You know? When you put an egg in vinegar, the shell disintegrates and we can see the inside.” Remus said.

“That’s… interesting” Roman said, slightly confused.

“It bounces a bit. However, if you throw it too far, it breaks. We could see how far we can throw it, and break a few!” Remus proposed.

Patton hummed. “I mean, that’s one of the most mild ideas you’ve had. I like it.” He smiled. “Except the breaking eggs part, I’d rather not participate on that.”

“Ya sure? It could be a good stress reliever…” Thomas said.

“OOH!” Remus exclaimed, hanging upside down from the couch. “You know when you crack an egg and there’s a small dead birdie inside?”

“Yeah…?” Virgil said. “What about it?”

“Let’s search for one!! With the vinegar thingie!” Remus flopped down the couch into the ground.

Roman snorted, amused. “How many eggs would be need to conjure for that?” He asked.

“Too many” Thomas said. “And the ones in supermarkets don’t have dead birds anymore.”

“We could… get chickens?” Patton suggested. “They are cute and… lay eggs”

“We are NOT getting chickens.” Janus said, gritting his teeth. “Can we go back to the issue at hand?”

“If we get enough eggs at the same day, we could start doing the experiment once a day.” Logan said. Janus looked at him annoyed. “this way we see how the chicken keeps growing.”

“How many eggs would we need?” Roman asked.

Logan stopped a second to think. “Thirty? Maybe? I need to research this…”

“Shouldn’t we have to have several for the same day?” Virgil added. “Just to know if there’s a chance of some eggs going faster than others”

“True, I hadn’t thought that.” Logan said. He conjured a notebook out of nowhere and started writing things down.

Thomas laughed. “What are you guys going to do with the eggs afterwards?”

“FOOD WAR” Remus yelled. “Whoever gets more dirty has to clean afterwards with a toothbrush!”

“Now, kiddo, we all live here, we all clean” Patton said.

Remus grunted. “Fineeeee.”

“So, three eggs per day, for example, for at least… a month?” Roman said. “That’s a whole lot of chickens.”

“Thank god they won’t be real” Thomas said, chuckling.

“Hello?” Janus said, waving. “Are we forgetting about our little issue?”

“Come on, J-anus” Remus said. “You’re cranky when tired.”

Virgil laughed. “He’s a bitch when tired, indeed”

“Honestly, I’m tired too” Patton said. “Wanna take a nap, Jan?”

“Don’t Jan me, Morality.” Janus snapped. He sighted, rubbing his eyes. “Sorry, you’re right. I’m not… in my right mind”

“Who took the stick out of his butt?” Remus asked.

“I hate you” Janus said.

Remus laughed. “HA! No, you don’t.”

Thomas laughed, breaking the tension. “Come on, I’m going to take a nap too. We’ll figure out what to do later.”

Janus groaned. “…fine” He said. He turned to the others. “Do NOT infest this with chickens, understood?”

“So, do infest this with chickens? Ok, we can do that” Virgil said, smiling like the little brat he was.

Janus send him a dead glare. “Listen up here, you little shit—”

Patton grabbed him by the shoulders, turning him to leave with Thomas. “Now, that’s a good idea Virgil! Keep track of them, please. We’ll be sleeping, have fun!”

Having said that, the three of them disappeared upstairs. Remus waited in silence for exactly five seconds an a half, before jumping to Patton’s spot.

“If you can make black pudding with pig’s blood, could we do that with human blood?” He asked.

“I mean… maybe?” Roman said. “We could make black pudding with any blood, right?”

“Why the fuck would you want to do that?” Virgil said. “Black pudding tastes like shit” (It doesn’t it’s delicious. Specially from Burgos.)

“We could find out some other day, Remus.” Logan said. “Weren’t we busy with the egg experiment?”

“The Eggsperiment, you mean?” Roman said, smirking.

Logan sighted. “I’m going to ignore that comment. Shall we start summoning chickens here, or in the imagination?”

“Imagination, please” Virgil requested. “Otherwise we’d had to clean up after ourselves and I’m very lazy.”

“Ok, emoboy!” Remus said. “How many chickens?”

“I believe a hundred would be sufficient to start the experiment.” Logan said. “In case one of them doesn’t lay an egg at the same day as the others.”

“You know…” Roman started. “Why chickens?”

“Sorry, what?” Logan asked.

“Why chickens?” Roman repeated. “Any egg would do, right? As long as they have calcium, right?”

“WE COULD DO SNAKE EGGS AND THROW THEM AT JANUS” Remus yelled.

“Don’t scream, Remus” Logan said. “Thomas is asleep.”

“Oh, ok” Remus said. “We could do snake eggs and throw them at Janus” He said again, in a whisper-scream.

“He’ll hate you if you do it.” Virgil said. “Count me in.”

“Alright then” Logan said, scratching the word chicken out of his notebook and replacing it with snake. “Snake eggs. Which type of snakes?”

“What species is Janus?” Roman asked.

“No idea” Virgil said. “But, he gets really groggy once he wakes up, so if we’re fast and ask him then, he won’t lie”

“And then he’d try to kill whoever asked for using that against it.” Remus said. “So fun!”

“I don’t feel like dying today, someone else go wake him up.” Roman said.

“Coward” Virgil joked, obtaining some offenses Princey noises™. “Not me, though”

“Not me!” Remus exclaimed, trying not to scream.

Everyone turned to Logan. He sighted. He handed Roman his notebook and adjusted his tie.

“The things I do for love…” He muttered, as he silently made his way upstairs.

**Author's Note:**

> Thanks for reading and please comment cause it rises my self esteem. I promise I'll reply once I'm back from my trip. Unless you don't want me to reply, obviously.


End file.
